by Balaclava Dog
Greetings from New Republic of Slaviyansk-Dogtopia! We have seized control of local dog pound from forces loyal to evil cat-loving Kievan Junta, namely dirty squirrel called "Boris."
We assert sovereign right of local Russian dog to piss on fire hydrant and stick head out tractor window on freeway. We also demand right of unification with other Russian dog near Stravinsky sausage factory.
Western media is criticize us because pissing on fire hydrant, but fire hydrant is symbol of evil Atlanticist alliance that want replace us with poodle and other gay sex pet like octopus.
Dog pound of Slaviyansk is ancient holy territory of all Great Mother Russia dogs for many year. Some Ukraine people not agree, saying dog pound was before hair trim salon for cat called “Pussy Pussy Babushka” and must to give back to Ukraine. But I find ancient chewy bone behind sofa proving this false. Also no hairballs!
Media in West say we control by human from Moscow -- his name Vladimir -- with dog whistle and very delicious imported horsemeat in can by Shostakovich Brothers, 23 Balalaika Street, Moscow "bulk order discounts available." I never taste such horsemeat. It is capitalist lie! We act freely and because we are dog.
As you see from selfie photo, I wear very nice balaclava. This not because is terrorist pup or Pussy Riot, but because old sock with many hole. It stuck on head by accident. Long story!
Now must go. Miss Abby Martin from Russia Today (Slightly Bigger Tomorrow) want interviewing me.
Long live ancient Republic of Slaviyansk-Dogtopia and support our struggle by defriending fellow nationalist on Facebook."
With apologies to Eric Arthur Blair.
We assert sovereign right of local Russian dog to piss on fire hydrant and stick head out tractor window on freeway. We also demand right of unification with other Russian dog near Stravinsky sausage factory.
Western media is criticize us because pissing on fire hydrant, but fire hydrant is symbol of evil Atlanticist alliance that want replace us with poodle and other gay sex pet like octopus.
Dog pound of Slaviyansk is ancient holy territory of all Great Mother Russia dogs for many year. Some Ukraine people not agree, saying dog pound was before hair trim salon for cat called “Pussy Pussy Babushka” and must to give back to Ukraine. But I find ancient chewy bone behind sofa proving this false. Also no hairballs!
Media in West say we control by human from Moscow -- his name Vladimir -- with dog whistle and very delicious imported horsemeat in can by Shostakovich Brothers, 23 Balalaika Street, Moscow "bulk order discounts available." I never taste such horsemeat. It is capitalist lie! We act freely and because we are dog.
As you see from selfie photo, I wear very nice balaclava. This not because is terrorist pup or Pussy Riot, but because old sock with many hole. It stuck on head by accident. Long story!
Now must go. Miss Abby Martin from Russia Today (Slightly Bigger Tomorrow) want interviewing me.
Long live ancient Republic of Slaviyansk-Dogtopia and support our struggle by defriending fellow nationalist on Facebook."
With apologies to Eric Arthur Blair.
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